Remember when I was young and so were you
And time stood still and love was all we knew
You were the first, so was I
We made love and then you cried
Remember when we vowed the vows and walked the walk
Gave our hearts, made the start, it was hard
We lived and learned, life threw curves
There was joy, there was hurt
Remember when old ones died and new were born
And life was changed, disassembled, rearranged
We came together, fell apart
And broke each other’s hearts
Remember when the sound of little feet
Was the music we danced to week to week
Brought back the love, we found trust
Vowed we’d never give it up
Remember when thirty seemed so old
Now lookin’ back, it’s just a steppin’ stone
To where we are, where we’ve been
Said we’d do it all again
Remember when we said when we turned gray
When the children grow up and move away
We won’t be sad, we’ll be glad
For all the life we’ve had
And we’ll remember when
-Alan Jackson ‘Remember When’
I know. I just made you read all those country lyrics, but trust me, you need to read them to know what this whole post is about!
Whenever I hear this song I think about my grandparents and their intense love for each other. They have always been one of those couples that I grew up adoring, and this song just pulls at my heart for them whenever I hear it.
Now it makes me cry for more then that, because as I’ve grown up I see them much more as real people who make real mistakes. I don’t agree with all the choices they’ve made and continue to make. Now I cry a little for the bit of childlike innocence that I have lost.
That’s a part of growing up, I know. That’s why we want children to stay young, to believe in magic and to think that maybe those lights outside are fireflies, or maybe just maybe they’re fairies.
A recurring theme in my life as I’ve grown up and even now is thinking how I want to be similar and different than my parents. As I’ve grown that circle has expanded to others, other individuals, couples, parents. I’ve drawn on what I’ve seen and decided if I want to be like it or not, make my own path or continue down their’s, life’s little choices. I’ve always known that seeing my parents change from superhero’s to humans was a sign of me growing up, and I’ve liked (mostly) seeing them change into real people. I actively believe that it strengthens our relationship and has definitely helped make them part of my super tight inner circle.
But I don’t know if I can say the same for seeing my grandparents as people, because that really does mean saying goodbye to part of your childhood. And that’s hard. Not that my grandparents are bad people, but because that change between grandparents and humans seems so big. And that’s why I’m writing about it, because I truly believe that being open about hard things is what makes you someone who participates and not just floats.
This song also makes my heart jump with hope. “Remember when the sound of little feet
Was the music we danced to week to week…” Just makes my heart sigh with longing. I know its not that far away, but I tell you what: it’s something I’ve wanted my whole life. Now here I am, less then a year away from saying “I do”, not too too far away from hearing those little feet (ok, it’s a few years away, but thats a whole lot closer then when I was 15!). I know soon I’ll be dancing to that music, I’ll see my own parents become grandparents. Their hands will start looking a lot more like my grandparent’s. I’ll be living the season of life that one day I’ll look back on fondly, when my own kids will be having kids, when “We won’t be sad, we’ll be glad for all the life we’ve had”.
That’s what this Alan Jackson song makes me thing of. This whole big circle of life.
And maybe thats why I cry a little when I listen to it.